Monday

for all you lovers out there today, love ya!

Under my unbrella ella ellla eh eh

Something to ponder

Westjet is having a dece' sale right now. Flights to New York and Hawaii $139!

Squawking in BC

.
CBC News

RCMP in B.C. have busted another marijuana grow operation in the Kootenays, but how and where they found it has some locals squawking.

An investigation began when a concerned citizen spotted a large macaw parrot hanging around Salmo, just south of Nelson, and phoned the local RCMP detachment.
Const. Brad Williams is no ornithologist, but he knew enough about birds to know parrots are not typical residents of mountainous southern B.C., so he followed the bird.
"The first place I came to is this abandoned mill site and as I walked down I saw more parrots," Williams told CBC News.
"I guess you'd call it a giant bird cage which is full of giant macaw parrots, which we have yet to explain," he said.

But the parrots weren't the only thing they found in the abandoned sawmill. Hidden deep inside the mothballed mill was a sophisticated hydroponic grow-op with 450 marijuana plants.
"The bird squawked so to speak," Williams said after apprehending two men, destroying the plants and shutting down the operation.
The birds, about a half-dozen of them, were as healthy and well tended as the marijuana plants, said Williams, and have been left for the men, who were released without charges, to claim whenever they want.
"At this point, the birds have lots of food. As far as I am concerned there is no problem with the birds being here," he said.

"It's not the typical scenario that we run into as police every day."
The operation was one of the largest the RCMP have found on a commercial property in the region, said Const. Shane Orr.

"It's unfortunate to see that the economic climate is such that you'd turn to growing marijuana in a closed sawmill, but that seems to be the case here," he said.


This story amazes me. First, why would the grow-op guy have the birds? What a red flag and attractent to your illegal activity. Second, the police think that the economic climate was why the grower decided to start this operation? Ummm, its Salmo. The West Kootenays are in their own little world, they dont know there is a global economic crisis! hahha, I remember I read on CBC sometime ago that the drug industry in BC is worth more then all our industries combined. I dont mean to pick on cops, but seriously, they make it so easy.
For the record, drugs are bad!

The International let down.

Oh my gawd, let me spare you. It took me 4 days to get through "The International" with Clive Owen. And I still dont know what was really going on.
And what the fuck was Naomi Watts doing in the movie? That role was completely rediculous. This movie was like watching a 4 hour low budget James Bond movie with Lauren from the Hills tagging along for 3/4 of it.
Clive wasnt even that hot in the movie, he looked like shit for most of it.

Wet, wild and drunk as f**k.

If you want to get in on the super wicked awesome fun raft race from bridge to bridge then you gotta call Canyon Raft and get your team signed up. There are 4 boats left

The race is THIS Thursday June 18th.
Meet at the Coal Creek Boat Launch tommorow evening.
423-7226
Canyon Raft Company

Pirates Gain Parliment Seat in the EU

Sweden's Pirate Party has won a seat in the European Parliment in elections held on Sunday. The group—which ran on a platform "to fundamentally reform copyright law, get rid of the patent system, and ensure that citizens' rights to privacy are respected."—earned a 7% vote.
This is a massive coup for the group, who earned only .63% of the vote in Sweden's 2006 elections. They gained traction through active participation in a number of high-profile debates about Internet Freedom and privacy, including a case against the bittorrent site The Pirate Bay, which found one of the founders Twittering from the courtroom.

Such utilization of up-to-date technology, along with the tidal shift in voter demographics in Sweden (and elsewhere in Europe) may indicate that a time for a reasoned and rational discussion of the copyright and how it fits into modern technology may be upon us.



On a local note, Fernie pirates are still fighting for their right to party.

Scratch This.

There already is a buzz going on about Activision's DJ Hero, the makers of Guitar Hero. In direct competition, Genius Products, 7 Studios and Quincy Jones III are putting together a little DJ game of their own and it looks like a force not to be reckoned with. In addition, they pulled in big time DJ equipment makers, Numark, to give the hardware a realistic feel.

Great! How many bars are gonna hold "Ultimate DJ" nights now? hahahaha

Deb does delights

The Red Tree Restarant is getting a new summer menu. I cant wait to see what Deb has created! Deb is so good. soooo good. Holla!

PS. Dont forget they have mojitos AND a patio.

July 15th

The Vogue will be open for July 15th. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince opening weekend! OMG OMG OMG OMG

Where are they?

Where the fuck is Jann Arden and Bonnie Raitt these days anyway?
Jann has a Twitter account! haha boring!
Where is the music ladies?
Bonnie, you aint giving us anything to talk about!

Hugo Chavez has zero tolerance for Coke Zero

The Venezuelan government of U.S.-critic President Hugo Chavez on Wednesday ordered Coca-Cola Co to withdraw its Coke Zero beverage from the South American nation, citing unspecified dangers to health, Reuters reports.
The decision follows a wave of nationalizations and increased scrutiny of businesses in South America's top oil exporter.

Health Minister Jesus Mantilla said the zero-calorie Coke Zero should no longer be sold and stocks of the drink removed from store shelves while the government investigated its ingredients. The government's news agency:

“The product should be withdrawn from circulation to preserve the health of Venezuelans”.


Wow, I wonder how many Coke Zeros Harper chugs back a day? Prolly like 10 during every bible study.

White People Love Yoga

It's that time of year again, for Yoga in the Park!!

Join Tara first at Evolution Health and Fitness on Monday June 29th at 6:30pm.

Then, starting July 6th, meet her at the Annex Park Mondays and Wednesdays at 6:30pm!

What if it Rains you say?? Well then join her back at the Gym.

Cost: By Donation as always.

BYOM - Bring your own Mat if you can!!

Better not let me down.

The Runaways are going to be made into a movie.
I intitally was stoked, becuase I have been a long time lover of the 70's rock girl group since I discovered my deep love of rock at the tender age of 5.
Being a HUGE Joan Jett and Runaways lover, I should love that this movie is coming.
But that vacant bitch Kristen Stewart from Twilight is playing Joan Jett. How does that make you feel? GO!
LOL!
Dakota Fanning plays Cherie Currie.
Can those two chicks pull off this movie? Seriously Rock n Roll is a lifestyle and the Runaways are ROCK AND ROLL. They better not fuck it up.
I feel I must share my top Chick Rock n Roll Songs with you to celebrate this movie making.






www.therunaways.com

Local police working hard for your protection.

It has been brought to my attention that a young fellow nearly escaped getting a fine from the "bald cop" for riding his bike on the sidewalk downtown Fernie at 11:30pm. So I guess the lesson of the day kids, is: dont ride you bike on the sidewalk at 11:30pm. Ahhh sweet justice is served in Fernie. Thanks Officer.

White People

Have you had your hands on this book yet?

So so so good.

Here is a website that will have you laughing and nodding for hours.

http://www.stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/

Order It Here

OMG OMG

A-Trak's website says he'll be Calgary on the July 23rd at the HIFI.

But there is no mention of it on Hifi's site and ticketmaster is only selling the Edmonton and Van shows. AHHH, someone tell me if this is true and where can I get a ticket???

Coming Up Quick.

Micky Slim

Royal Hotel

Friday June 19

Tickets $10 - NOW AT FREYJA

Get them fast!

Seriously we always sell out before the show then you guys who wait till the last minute start calling me at home. Just buy one and support good shows coming to town so they dont stop coming cuz you'd rather spend your money on cheap beer and sit at home sulking that paying cover is retarded. Get over it. This show is going to be stupid fun!!! yeeeow!

Support the local economy, support good shows, support your friends that have jobs there and need the tips to survive, you dont want them to leave or resort to selling drugs do you? I dont know why Im ranting right now, I guess Im just in the mood. roar.

Say no to cable. Its hard I know.

After all my roommates moved out, I decided to cancel my cable. Although I am addicted to The Bachelorette and Kevin Newman on Global News, I made the rash decision feeling all good and intectual. I thought "oh man, all the time to read books and do yoga!". LOL - ya right, I found myself laying on the couch, eating my 6th Girl Guide cookie and watching The Red Green show on a fuzzy reception of CBC. Is this what I've become without cable? Is this what no cable does to everyone? I dont even know the top 20 on "So you think you can dance?". I was so left out on the conversation over drinks the other night.

But, you'll be happy to hear that I have turned my new pathetic ways around in less then a week.

Having no cable made me:

-run 10kms on Sunday

-Change all the furniture in my house around

-Call my mom

-Text my friends back

-Call old friends instead of email!

-Arrange an elaborate surprise birthday- in which I needed a gyspy costume and script!

Those are just some highlights. I do feel better, it was hard at first though!

See, no cable IS good for you, its not just what elitist people say to try and make you feel stupid around them!

In and Out

Whats happening this summer? Dont want to be caught looking like a dork, I will clarify for you "what's up" on the Fernie scene:

In ---------------------------------Out
Feathers ----------------------------Bling
Dewalt ------------------------------Mastercraft
Bud Light Lime ----------------------Coolers
Townie Bike -------------------------Downhill Bikes
Garage Sales ------------------------Alberta
Nachos (makin a huge comeback!) ---Calamari
Bocce -------------------------------Hockey
Writing in your journal --------------Writing letters to governments
Tanlines ----------------------------Pastey white chicken legs
Allergies ----------------------------Swine Flu

LOL.

Someone just told me.

NO TEXTICLES: a guy who uses text messages one too many times when really he should call already

Dry is here to stay.

Already!

The Drive FM:
Extreme Rating for Fire South of Kimberley
Fire ratings across BC continue to climb, thanks to recent hot and dry weather.

The East Kootenay region is included in this now seeing an extreme rating in an area south of Kimberley to north of Canal Flats.

Southeast Fire Centre Fire Information Officer Gwen Eamer says despite this, there are no fire bans.

If you do see smoke, Eamer says don't assume someone else has reported it, call the Fire Center at 1-800-663-55-55 immediately. If you are outdoors a lot you might wanna program this number in your cell as its going to be a long long dry summer.

Patio Life

The Central's Patio is slated to open July 1st. It looks amazing up there too! Cant wait to chill up there with my homies.

Bummer

Weekend Happenings

Well, major bummer, the weather is supposed to be craptacular, but doesnt mean you cant dance inside at the Royal's DJ Jam night Friday night avec moi!
The Relay for Life is on Saturday, head down for a few laps to support if you arent already on a team. Its a good time and the entertainment line-up sounds wicked cool.
Dont be mad at the rain, we need it folks.

Freaky

Meet Dewy

I dont recommend grooming your own dog. Although this pictue of my dog brings the LOLs!

Effective June 1

Starting June 1st you will need your passport to jot down to Montana, or wherever in the US. The long awaited rule starts now. To enter the US you will need your passport or one of those enhanced drivers licenses or a status card.
Annoying if you dont have one. And if you dont have one, dont bother with the Cranbrook "Passport Processing" office, all it does is proof-read your info and mail it off for 6 weeks like you would here in Fernie anyway. Also, 19 passport applications that were mailed from the Cranbrook office to Quebec, were lost in the mail. REEEEEAAALLLY shitty for those 19 people who lost all of there most important info likey to identity theives.

Study finds dancing leads to sex

Uhhh ya, If you havent heard yet, the Royal's DJ Jam night fucking went OFFFF last Friday. Ahhh summer is back! Ya Cona, Ya Alex, Ya Jenn making a big debut, Ya Jodie, Ya Scotty!!! I danced so hard I bruised the bottom of my feet, Im still in pain this Sunday, true story.

Summer Beer for Canadians

The Globe and Mail is predicting that this new-to-Canada beer from Bud Light will be the end to Corona. Bud Light Lime has been available in the US for years and after - of course! - many Facebook groups dedicated to bringing the beer to Canada, Bud Light Lime will be here in Fernie this summer.
The beer is artificially flavored with lime. From the critical reviews Ive found, if people like it, THEY LOVE IT, also many say its more of a cooler then a beer.
I want to try it, but I highly doubt Im gonna like it. Why fix something that wasnt broke? Remember Coke "Lime" and Pepsi "Lime"? Yeah they were cool at first, but that artifical taste gets old and you go back to the original good taste that you loved.
Pumping beer with more chemicals just sounds gross to me. Ill take that Corona thank you, sorry Mr.Bartender, you'll just have to spend that extra 3 seconds grabbing me a lime wedge.

Big News

Archie Comics has just announced that the 84-year-old teenager Archie Andrews is proposing to his girlfriend, Veronica Lodge, this August, in the first of a six-part-story called “Archie Marries Veronica.”


-Im not surprised, crazy bitches tend to keep their men around longer then the nice girls do. I wonder what would happen if Archie and the girls lived in Fernie rather then Riverdale? I suspect their would be no proposal. I bet Archie would be floundering around at the bars everynight with Peter Pan. The girls would be pinning for a text message from him, add a few pregnancy scares here and there. Oh ya this is no Riverdale! hahha I grew up reading these comics, and I always rooted for Betty, poor Betty. Its like I keep saying to my friends, better to marry late then be divorced.

The Great Outdoors

Summer is sneeking up, the sun is hot and nature calls everyone out to the great outdoors, at this time I feel I must share one of my most favortie movies of all time. I am such a sucker for John Hughes movies!! This movie has always been a staple in my childhood, as my sister always reminds me when Im eating a hot dog that "they are made from lips and assholes". And I find myself yelling "go find yourself a spin cycle" at Albertan drivers.
Enjoy these clips. And during this raining June, rent it, hell go buy it!


Click here to find out what hot dogs are made of

Carbs

Goddamn,

I just heard that Big Bang Bagels is moving into the Cappuccino Corner. Great, bikini season is upon us and you stick a bagel shop on the corner!!! ARGH
Good for them tho, what a great spot

Bike Chic

Check out these new bike helmets. So fashiony. So interesting. So not-breathable. But I wonder if this will carry from New York to Fernie, bike helmets do need a re-vamp. They are pretty dorky looking.
More Bike Helmet Styles Here

Graff Fines in Fernie

Fernie Council gave three readings to an amendment Monday night, adding graffiti to the 'Unsightly Premises Bylaw'.

The bylaw would give the City the ability to fine people caught committing graffiti vandalism.

Mayor Cindy Corrigan says the amendment also means businesses would be responsible for cleaning up graffiti on their property.

Anyone caught doing graffiti can be fined a minimum of one thousand dollars.


Ahhhh, I know graff is illegal and most of it is shit, but I feel like Im in the movie Footloose. As someone who LOVES graffiti I wish that Fernie was more amped to provide spaces and allow good art, like murals on city buildings for example.
Last year Freyja held an art show that allowed local graff artists a venue to display their art. I guess we are gonna have to do the same thing this year.

Happy Shopping

Freyja is Open after a long haul of renos.
New stock from Gentle Fawn, Insight, Kensie and BB Dakota.
Shoes from Sam Edleman and Dolce Vita!!
Feather hair accessories galore!
Everything is 20% off till June 2.

Get Your Beach On.

A beach volleyball court is going in the back of the Royal Hotel.
I cant picture it, but Im sure it'll be sweet, as anything Simon backs money to never looks like shit.
I've always dreamed of putting my feet in sand downtown Fernie with a cold beer in my hand. And now its all happening.

Cool.

Looks like the basement Of the Vogue Theatre might become a bar. Not a bangin nightclub, but a smokin scotch and whiskey lounge!! How fucking cool!
Apparently there is a jail cell down there from back in the day. The owner wants to leave it down there and work with it in the design. The renos upstairs sound amazing too, lots of blacks and blood reds. Again, very cool.
Cant wait, Fernie is sure rolling along...

Mark it down somewhere.

Yoga in the Park will start on July 6th, and run Mondays and Wednesdays at 6:30pm.

Location: Annex Park. That's in Fernie BC for all those not living in the Rockies...

ByoM, thats bring your own mat, and remember your sunscreen!
Tara will run this series for five weeks, ending on August 5th.

BACK - Almost!

The Renos are sick, the new clothes and shoes are re-dic'...
Should be open this Monday...

Yeesh

Obama's Visit to Canada Cost Taxpayers:
Travel - $2708
Tranportation - $25,000
Hospitality - $130,000
Health - $9000
Admin - $225,000
Ottawa Police - $3,000,000
RCMP - $1,011,874

Couldnt they have just used Skype??

Life is just better in BC

Remember the days when you used to stock up in Alberta on beer before you cam home to BC. Well over the last year, beer prices have risen in Alberta, making them the province that pays the most.
Buying an average 24 of Molson will cost you:
In Alberta - $24.99
In BC - $21.15
In Ontario - $19.99
In Quebec - $18.12

So, may as well shop local for all your BBQ juice needs.

Awkward

Did you know that if you have an awkward moment with someone it officially takes you 17 more encounters with that person for you and the other person to truely be over the incident. Some scientist studied it.
I learned that last night on The Bachelorette. hmm.

His Ride

Now this is how you arrive to a party. effin RE-DIC'

Give Me A Heart

So apparently flashing the ol' peace sign is waaay outta style. In Hollywood its "out". The NEW way to flash for the camera is to give a big "heart hand". I wish this blog was a joke, as I still flash a peace sign from time to time. However, young hipsters are emerging with the heart hand and its catching on faster then a wild fire. Here we see Miley and Taylor showing us the new way.

Summer is upon us and cameras will be mighty busy snapping away our memories for immediate facebook uploading. Here are some tried and trusty poses for the camera this season: the "#1" - the "Thumbs up" - and of course, still my fav - "The Flying V"

Hipsters say YA!

The Sounds have a new album out June 2nd! YAY!
However you can purchase the new single on itunes right now.

Over the last few years, The Sounds have garnered a massive fanbase built upon non-stop touring in support of two acclaimed records. They have captivated fans around the world by playing more than 500 shows in support of their last album, selling out major venues in over 25 countries worldwide, including the legendary Hollywood Palladium. The band has been confirmed as support for No Doubt this summer, along with a series of headlining dates.
The Sounds

Free Iced "Latte"

This Thursday May 21st, head to Tim Hortons for a free small ICED latte.
You may have heard that Tims is making lattes, I mean they are running commercials during the hockey games so you musta heard about this.
I was curious. Was I going to walk into Tims and actrually see a big cappuccino machine with real expresso grinds? I consider myself a conosuier of lattes after working at at Second Cup for 2 years and being doned with a "Prima Barista" pin from head office that I worked my ass off for. I loved that "flair", sign. Anyway, back to Tim's...No its not like a big Starbucks latte. Mugshots, Freshies and the local coffee shops are still the local champions of authentic Italian coffees. Tims latte's just get shot out of a machine like those cappuncino vending machines. But to be fair, they arent that bad, and you can try a free ICED latte this Thursday noon to 5pm.
Pros:
Cheap (About $2.50 for a medium)
Comes with the good kind of lid. Not the ones where you have to rip open and push into the slot and it won't stay down.
Good flavour

Cons:
Made with 2% milk only, no exceptions
No decaf option

Still Good

Boston Pizza as been under renos this month, since its my fav hangout in Fernie, shocking - but true, I thought Id pop by the Sports Bar side today to dine and check it out. The 90's glam is all gone, replaced by a more subdued look, reminiscent of a "ABC Country Restaurant" meets Earls in 2003. Its good! Walls are really bare, Im assuming that some sort of art is still to come.
The menu is still the same, still full of its awesomeness and consistent tasty items.
Service was perfect, attentive yet not over at the table interrupting us every 10 minutes.
The patio looks like they are getting it all cleaned up too, you may be sitting in a parking lot, but the beer is cold and you can have cactus cut potatoes and mushroom caps!! YUM
Right now just the Sports Bar side is open, they are reno'ing the restuarant side now. Should all be done in less then 2 weeks.

Breakfast; most important meal of the day.

Have you been for breakfast at the Old Elevator yet? Yes! They are opened for breakfast on the weekend. Its so (insert Oprah voice)GooooooooooooooooooD!
Its cheaper then Smitty's, like the Toque but more fine dining and gourmet. The portions are decent, and you leave without that overstuffed bloat feeling.
Don't be afraid of the gloomy atmosphere, be more afraid of the ghosts. Rumor is, a customer had a citing just a week ago. He was so shaken up the dinner party had to cancel and leave.
Im just saying that to me - the food is worth the supernatural encounters.

I suggest the Egg and Bacon Sandwich , or if you are bored with the Eggs Benedict offers around town, try this one, its different for sure but delectable and memorable.

Mad.

So I go for a run along the Annex park trail, having a great time, sun is shining, kids are running around, got my itunes cranked. Really good time. Until this dog incident happened and I ran all the way back to my house fuming mad.

As I came running up to the entrance of the parking lot to Annex park, a stylish couple on reeealllly shiny expensive chopper style bikes start coming my way. As soon as I saw them I profiled them and immediately concluded that by the way they were dressed, by the look of their bikes, the fact that I didn't recognize them and their blank no-passing-by-smile, that they were not from here.
As I was passing the man their dog appeared from no where and ran up to me. I was very startled to see a giant Doberman off-lease coming towards me. I stopped in panic until the dog seemed to sense that I was not interested and it walked by me.
I was pissed. Why? ooohhhhhhhh you totally wanna know don't you?
Well half of me panicked for the families I just passed back down the path that had a 4 year old frolicking around and other small children on bikes. I thought I could bitch these assholes out now, or they are gonna get it down the path from a parent anyway (-and I hope a parent ripped them a new asshole). But before I could decide they had biked well enough down the path for me to just keep going. "Ohhh don't you just have the most stylish fucking bikes to match your edgy dog, to match this image you are trying so hard to achieve, you goddamn narcissists. Ohh you are sooo coool and edgy!! not", I thought to myself.
Here's my thing:
People are generally stupid and sorry if this post offends you. BUT here's my story (remember that I am a major dog lover, if you know me, you know Dewy). When I was 12 years old, I was walking down the street and my lil sister who was a mere and innocent 8 years old was walking about 2 blocks ahead of me. In a split second the neighbour's dog shot across the street, lunged for my sister and sank his teeth into her arm and shoulder. The absolute horror of seeing that is something that brings tears to my eyes still 16 years later. And as for the kind man that was driving his minivan by witnessing the entire thing, screeching to a stop, jumping out in traffic, kicking the dog off her and throwing her into his van, rushing her to the hospital, ya he was disturbed too. How do you think my kid sister felt? What do you think that street sounded and looked like at that moment? HORRIFYING indeed.

The neighbors dog was a German Sheppard. The owners claimed "hes great, "he'd never hurt a fly" "hes never done ANYTHING like this before" "this dog is tame!!". We know this because the neighbor was my mom's best friend...at the time. lol.

In that day the ignorance of that dog owner had sure caused quite a disturbing memory. Every time my beautiful sister wears a dress or tank top, we are reminded of that day and the dog owner's ignorance as the scars cascade down her arm. Having their dog tied up would have prevented my mom from receiving a phone call that her child was screaming for her life in the hospital emergency room. If you are a parent, can you imagine getting that call? My parents for months after struggled with the suggestions they had received to pursue a lawsuit, but because it was my moms best friend, they were left in a very awkward position and in the end, did not go through with it - today they reflect and are regretful they didn't. You can damn well agree that in this day a lawsuit would not be debatable. As a peace offering that owner of the dog offered to replace my sister's $12 shirt that the dog's teeth destroyed. Fuck your fucking shirt offer is what I think now!!!
The horror of that day and experience burns in my stomach. EVERY TIME I see a big dog off leash I think about that day, and I think about people's ignorance.
Now don't give me any fucking bulshit here, I can hear you already, "but our dog is amazing, shes the best, she has never showed violence, hes all love, hes well trained"...yada yada yada.
I get it, the thing is YOU DONT GET IT. That neighbors dog was an ex-RCMP dog. "Extremely well behaved, disciplined and retired" they said. Dogs are animals and animals have instincts, don't fucking kid yourself. Also, you might know your dog well, BUT I DON'T. When your dog runs up and jumps on me while I'm walking down main street, no Im not impressed and yes it frightened me, that's why you offer an awkward smile and say some stupid line like "ohhh hes good". Well that's terrific of you to say, you are trying to feel better about your lack of judgment and consideration for fellow people, but I'm annoyed as fuck and you just ruined my moment. Have some respect you absent-minded jerk!! LEASH!!

I certainly hope and pray the story of my sister NEVER gets repeated here in Fernie, but you know what- its inevitable. Something will happen one day and it wont be till then that we will all look at each other and say, "hmmm, welll duuhhhh that could have been prevented". TIE AND LEASH UP YOUR ANIMAL.

I promise you this, when I see you within city limits with a dog off-leash, I will passive-aggressively sneer at you, I hope I make you uncomfortable enough to at least THINK about it.

Ps. My new neighbor here in Fernie has a huge black mutt thing that they let roam around the neighbourhood. I have watched my shit-zu on a leash scramble and yelp as it nears because she is so scared of it, I have watched it give numerous giant turds to other neighbors groomed lawns and today - today I watched it take a long piss on a row of flowers a cute old lady planted outside her house the day before. But you know what, Im not even gonna go there, Im still mad about the off-leash Doberman.

Forget the ShamWow!