I would if I could

Oh WOW, this painting course offered through the Fernie Arts Station sounds AMAZING!
If I wasnt going to be surfing in Maui that month, Id totally be in this class:

Mandala Painting
Tuesays October 13-November 10 10:00am-12:00 noon
If “Ring of Fire” “Guardians & Gates”, and “Sacred Centre” pique your curiosity then take this chance to try this wonderful circle painting form. Each class begins with ‘scribbles’ and grounding movement… then quietly goes into one 5 week detailed, structured painting with personal symbols of your choosing. Beginners and return students welcome. Cost: $89 includes gouache & all materials
call Oz at the Station to register NOW before its full, cuz you know it will be 423-4842
Oh and for those who dont know what a Mandala is CLICK HERE

buzz.

Should be a good'er

Taste of Fernie is this weekend in Fernie, the weather should be good and the vendors this year stack up nicely.

Things you need to know:

1. Starts at Noon this Saturday. Fun for all ages, more fun for adults laterrrrr.
2. Barney Bentall is the headliner (Barney Bentall) B' is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3. It does cost some money, but the proceeds go to the Rotary Club and they do LOTS OF GOOD THINGS in this community. Trust me, good cause, drop your money and stop bitching.
4. Friday night is also a good time, buuuut tickets are prolly sold out, so good luck with that.
5. Shred Kelly plays at 5pm on Saturday too.
6. The Mountain Market is on, adjacent to the food vendors, bring cash!
7. Think about volunteering. Ive been volunteering like 4 years now, I do it cuz its a 'TIME!
8. "Moka Only" from Swollen Members fame, ya remember them, will be at Bulldogs late that night, get there early if you want in. Bulldogs did a bunch of renos this week, supposedly its gonna be more "night club'ish" in there now, so you can "find youself in the club" nowadays. neat.

If you need to know anything else go here to TASTE OF FERNIE

mmmm see ya thurrr

On another funny note, speaking of Swollen Members, they have a new video, its so so so dum, like waaaaaaaaaaay more dum then all the Ed Hardy shoes in the world. They went from rich chicks, skateboards and pools to Asian bike gangs, and dirty warehouses with prostitutes. WTF HAHAHAHAHA good luck with that, dont come to Fernie, keep that shit in Surrey.

Why?

Is that old man Fred Durst in those cell phone commericals that run over and over again on the US channels? WHHYYY???

I was wrong.

Okay, I have to admit, my friends were right. They told me to just keep reading the Twilight series, even tho I found it ridiculous, silly and boring. But, turns out, it was a great read, they are SO TOTALLY AWESOME!!!
Cant wait for the next movie, "New Moon" out November 20th.

OMG OMG OMG

I have discovered a new ceaser!!!
Its called the Mediterranean Ceaser, and its deeeelish!

So this is what you gotta do:

1. Get a tall glass with ice and rim it with coarse salt
2. Squeeze some fresh lime in there, sprinkle some tobasco
3. Add your preference of vodka
4. Splash in some basalmic vingear
5. Add a small handful of half size cucumber slices (cut off the dark green outer part) and a teaspoon of fresh minced garlic
6. Fill with clam
7. Garnish with a kalamata olive

You are just gonna DIE!!! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
You are so so welcome!

Over-use

I wonder what T-Pain would sound like without Auto-Tune?

Jeez!

Poor little Taylor, thats was crazy shit.

Progressss???

The Drive FM:
New Fernie Golf Course Takes Step Forward
The group looking to build a golf course resort in Fernie has taken a step forward.

Fernie mayor Cindy Corrigan says proponents of the Coal Creek Golf resort have made an offer to the city to purchase 34 acres of land that they've been eyeing for some time.

Corrigan says the next step is for lawyers to work on a consolidation of the property.

The Spirit of Fernie...kinda smells like beer and burning oil

Wow. Derby weekend has come and gone, my wallet is empty and my head hurts. Summer is over poeple, have you seen all the snow on Mt. Fernie?

Used Book Store in Fernie

Hey you guys all know there is a new Used Book Store in Fernie right?
Just giving you the head up.

Books Anew
1501 - 8th Ave (ANNEX)
Beside Kootenay Taxi, behind the car wash in the little house.
423-4100
booksanew@shaw.ca

They do trades! Neat.

Upstairs

Soooo, they are going ahead with the restaurant uptairs of the old Livery building. If the resturant is anything like how they re-did the store on the main floor, I think this will be the addition that downtown Fernie so so badly needed.
And our boy Farkas is the head chef!!! Should be opening late November!! Woot Woot!

Hump Day Download

I LOVE THIS MIX
Its gonna help this Wednesday cruise into Thursday just that much faster...
CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD "DANCE DANCE DANCE BY DJ GRANDTHEFT"

Mark Steele, Eat Your Heart Out

Please Dont

A fall election?
Are you kidding me????
NO. DONT DO IT!
Not that us here in Fernie have a fucking real choice in our voting or matter at all to Ottawa. But the Liberals need to first concentrate on getting their party's image and confidence up to a decent fucking standard level before taking on Harper. Marketing 101 you narrsissitic assholes.

Whyyyyy are you doing this. BAD TIMING. LET Harper deal with this economy shit and ride us out. Dont pull a Carole James and act all as if you REALLLLY would have done a better job or not have done the exact same plan anyway. Fuck Off!

Michael, dont listen to your people, have you ever read "the Emperors New Clothes"? its a short read, you can fit it in your schedule.

Sorry for the ranting, you know how politics make me feel.

WEIRD

Mack Culkin is the daddy?

Happening

Your smile is a first impression

Seriously, have you tried these floss rubber stick things? They're awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why do young-ish people here in Fernie neglect their teeth so much? I dont get it? You'd rather buy a hoodie then get your teeth cleaned and checked out? I hate the dentist too, but I understand that no matter how cool my hoodie is, when I smile and my teeth are shitty I am no longer really that attractive, my first impression to someone has really turned them off - no matter how many cool hoodies I have. Also, you cant get another set of teeth, unless they are fake and that sucks and is painful. If you cant find the money to maintain your teeth now, how do you expect to find the money later for costly surgeries and shit. Ahhhhh Im not your mother, but grow up, but Im just pointing out out obvious. PS. Good oral hygiene leads to a longer life lived - studies have proved it.
To all of you that keep up your teeth, gold stars for you!

Fall Trend - Distressed Denim

You wanna be cool this fall, like Brenda Fucking Walsh cool?
Distressed Denim is waaay in.
Here are some tips to make your denim ultra hip:

•A knife: You will need to place a block of wood inside the leg to offer some support and an adequate surface to press against. Rub the surface of the pants as though “shaving”, in any direction. Achieve the look you want, but respect the integrity of the fabric.

•A cheese grater: With some practice, you can achieve some very special looks with a cheese grater. The rougher side will produce a very interesting pattern of abuse on the denim.

•Sand Paper: This is my favorite tool, as it comes in many different “grits”. "Grit" refers to the number of abrasive particles per square inch of sandpaper. The lower the grit the rougher the sandpaper. Start with a medium grit and work up to a finer one for more control. You will achieve better results than with a knife. You can also find abrasive “sponges” in different grits. These are great to work with, as they are very easy to hold.

The more localized control that sandpaper offers will allow you to selectively fray pockets, hemlines, or any other part that you think will add to the natural worn look that you are after. You will also be able to more naturally blend the worn out areas with those not so worn out.

Do not weaken the stitching, this will only shorten the life of your creation. Place objects in the pockets, such as a round or rectangular drink coasters, and sand around their shape. This gives a very realistic worn wallet effect.

•Pumice Stones: These are also very effective tools for sanding denim. They work great for roughing up the edges of cut holes. As with the sandpaper, you can moisten the pumice in bleach.

•Power tools: You can also use power tools with grinding tips or other abrasive attachments. They will help you do things faster, but at the risk of overdoing. A Dremel Moto Tool is probably the easiest to handle and there are special tips with sandpaper attached.

Diggin it

I love this girl! Like, I wanna take her out to dinner.
http://www.myspace.com/anjulie

She's canadian too, so thats always neat.

Stella Got Her Groove Back

Oprah's premiere is only 13 days away! Ahhhhh Im counting down the fucking days!
Her premiere will be with Whitney Houston!
Fuck its gonna be good.
Miss Whitney is making a mad comeback with her new album, dont dismiss this crazy bitch, Whitney is of the the original divas and deserves maddddd respect. Bitch has sold some 170 million combined albums, singles and videos.
Music historians cite Whitney's record-setting achievements: the only artist to chart seven consecutive #1 Billboard Hot 100 hits; the first female artist to enter the Billboard 200 album chart at #1 (her second album, Whitney, 1987); and the only artist with seven consecutive multi-platinum albums! Shit Son!

So I think its appriopriate that because I am hitting up the MSTRKFT show this Friday, that I leave you with this song...

Derby Weekend

OMG its like better then Christmas!
Turn to page 36 in the September Fernie Fix for a Derby Survival Guide.

See ya there. Sunday September 6th.

New Look

The Free Press has a new website, its for sure an upgrade to 2003 from their 1999 verison.
You can read all about why Simon Howse's Parastone development has stalled.
When I read the article (in the actual paper paper), Fernie suddenly remined me of the fat kid at summer camp. That poor fat kid lagging behind all the other kids running down the path.
Im afraid that this fat aint gunna catch up to other BC smalltown kids...bummer for us.
The Free Press

Hoopin

Its catching on, big time. Not just for ravers anymore, hooping is taking over aerobics and dance classes in the big cities. Wii fit even hosts it.
Get your abs the funest way possible!
Pixie Hoops is havng a sale cuz they are overstocked from Sham...
PIXIE HOOPS

Entertaining

I appriciate.

Fall Goods

OBEY and RVCA fall is now at Freyja. And its sick. And the Obey is already half gone. Hurry down.

textsfromlastnight.com

Textsfromlastnight:

25042307** - Ya girls in Fernie love to hang their dirty clam out 4 sum brief validation.




Sad, cuz its true... Well only SOME girls. not all of course.
C'mon ladies, where's your dignity sometimes? Really??? All for a boy? A boy that is more then likey merely a sentance in the saga of your entrie life. Ahhhh I dont get it.

HAHA love it!

Squirrel photo couple: It’s real!

Top 10 reasons to look forward to fall

Summer sure feels like its over, even that late afternoon glow reminds of skipping class in September to "study" on the backfield.
There is still a few quick weeks left of summer, so make what you want of it.
However as fall approaches, Im taking the liberty to point out the top 10 reasons to look forward to autumn in Fernieland.

Top 10 Reasons to Look Forward to Fall in Fernie:

10. Fall Fashion
Sick Hoodies, Cords, New Jeans, Fall jackets, Leggings with cute dresses, TALL BOOTS!!! AHHHHH!!! FUN! Also this is the best time for Clothing Swaps!

9. Sports/Drinking at The Pub.
Dull rainy days call for ceasers and wings at the Pub. Just the comfortating way to make it thru till winter. Ghostrider games are back, NHL reappears and people commit to yoga classes.

8. Starting to plan out your winter ski/snowboard look/steez.
Scenesters and hill regulars get more amped on what they are gonna rock this year then what the Farmers Almanac forecasts. Dont you know its a fashion show up thuurrrr! duh

7. New people arrive.
Ahhh the fresh meat hits the streets and clubs. Entertaining for both sexes.

6. Vacations. If you were smart you saved your coin and have a fall trip planned. I am going to Maui. I put it on my credit card tho, Im half smart??? If you didnt save anything you can enter to win a trip to Costa Rica HERE

5. Demolition Derby
Sunday September 6th, Fernie Rodeo Grounds.
Brought to you by the fine folks from the Lions Club this specktacle will leave you with a hangover from hell and laughs and smiles for years. I recall my first experience with the Derby. I was young, naive, and working as a tv reporter. I was on the hunt for some good local television (chuckle). Well, I got my tv segment, along with sharp destinct memories of some of the best mullets I have ever seen in real life. Also, I gained a new respect for a "side" of Fernie that keeps this place a colourful and interesting city to reside in.

4. Food
Taste of Fernie and Taste of Scotch. PLUS with fall harvest, zuccinni loaves, pumpkin pies and butternut squash soup will keep you warm and toasty.

3. Kids go back to school, nuff said.

2. Halloween Parties and Secret Bush Raves. AHHH I love halloween, I take it almost as serisouly as my costumes for Shambhala. Last year I was Marie Antionette, I dont have anything planned yet, but never doubt me. And I hope there is another secret bush rave this year. So much fun. I hear its up Hartley Lake Road this year...

1. ALBERTANS GO HOME AND STOP BITCHING ABOUT GAS AND PST.
Wow, I know I work in retail and I should think about a career change and all, but fuck, Im fucking over explaining to Albertans, that yes, you do have to pay PST even tho you are from Alberta. And yes our province has PST, and yes it sucks for you cuz you arent used to it. You are here on vacay and Im very happy you chose Fernie, and Im happy you are shopping in the stores here, but you are irritating me to high hell. Our province is awesome, Im happy to pay the tax if it means I get to be in BC and not in AB. If you cop this 'tude with me one more time, Im not going to let you buy those $8 earrings that are on sale 50% off. This fall we do get a break from the tourists. Its okay to say it, we love tourism money ya ya ya, but its nice to have a break for our sanity. Right??? Or has retail made me a cold hard bitch? Don't answer that you dick.

Dedicated to John Drummond

Summer aint over yet!

Another Fabulous Beach Jam will be happ happ happening this Sunday at the West Fernie Swim hole. Bring some cash and donate to the cause, cuz throwing this jam costs Fedski money and we should pony up a little.
A Special Guest from Calgary will be hitting the decks and spitting on the mic.

Until then, download this sweet mix HERE

Major Bummer.

While I was at Sham, my most favoritist director of all time died. Im sad.
Director John Hughes suffered the heart attack while taking a morning walk during a trip to NYC to visit family. He was 59.

He directed such '80s hit films as "The Breakfast Club," Weird Science," "Sixteen Candles" and "Ferris Bueller's Day Off."

Those of you who claim to be an "80's baby," if you do not know who this man is you are NOT an 80's baby.

Mowgli was a bad boy

My Fav song from Sham...
Michael Jackson - Bad (Mowgli is Bad Remix)

yay.

I hate that Im forced to love the Transrockies. Cuz I dont like it.
Argh.
When the Euros come here, someone needs to explain to them that we dont have "whore houses" here, no matter how many times you ask.

Im Totally Going!

Kids.

Sometimes I think people are just having kids cuz they think its cool and they are searching for their next sense of fullfillment cuz the degree in whatever didnt bring it, neither did the jetta or the condo. Ya whatever I just said it. My mom recently gave me this article, it totally got me thinking. Have a read its really worth it. Im not afraid to have the conversation that not wanting kids isnt a bad thing. The part in the article about how the "pill" has really fucked up our idea of having a "desired" child kinda blew my mind...
Click this link below...

Macleans "The Case Against Having Kids"

94%

Dont worry Im alive and well. Im back from my favorite place on earth, Shambhala. After an intense week of fun and more fun(the part when Meesh showed up) and stupid fun, my brain is operating 94%, I hope to reach 100% brain power after only a few more minor setbacks, like Josh Martinez and the Demolition Derby.
If you have never been to Sham, well, I dont really have the energy to explain it to you. Its only the best party on the planet. period.
Even tho Im back, I cant stop tap tap tappping my feet and shaking my ass. Download the Smalltown DJs shambhala mix if you know whats good for you. Also dont forget, Friday September 4th, MSTRKRFT W/ Steve Aoki & Smalltown DJS at Flames Central in Calgary. Kinda important. www.ticketmaster.ca

Smalltown Romeo X Smoke & Mirrors – Shambhala 2009 Mix

One Last Thing...

Drugs are bad...

Peace Im Out!

Happy Shambhala'ing Everyone..
Bring Gum Boots!


See the rest of yas in a week, make that two weeks.

http://www.shambhalamusicfestival.com/

Sign of the Times

Are Ravers Taking Over Warped Tour?

First the turnout at EDC, now Warped Tour? It seems as though electro based music is taking over at music festivals. As URB predicted about a year ago, electro/ hip hop infused screamo is becoming a hit with the kids. This year at the Vans Warped Tour, acts like Millionaires, Attack Attack! and Brokencyde are drawing large audiences with their hybrid style of music. The kids who were too embarrased to admit they like crunk and those too embarrassed to admit they like screamo can finally unite, kind of. Warped Tour is currently in the middle of their dates, ending in Los Angeles on August 23.

Overpiced Dollar Shit.

Is it just me or is the Bargain Bargain Bargain Store not all that "Bargain-y" these days??
You cna get better deals at Cambodian Tire!

Attention

"ONLY YOU CAN PREVENT FOREST FIRES"

Weak Human Being Here

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I couldnt take it anymore, I totally lied, having no cable is stupid! I broke down this week and got my cable turned on. Faaaaaack.
Having no cable is sooo wrong! Last night I was reunited with Kevin Newman and the rest of the most rediculous newcasters I have ever seen on Global Vancouver. Now I can get my jollies laughing away at their newscasts and catch up on all the trash TV I have missed so dearly!

310-SHAW

Breaking up is hard to do

Dear Bud Light Lime

Im sorry, Im just not that into you anymore. It was fun while it lasted but you and I both know it wasnt going to last. Im sure you'll find someone else just great. Im running back to my ex, 5% Budweiser and I have had a long history and I need some comfort and familiarity right now. Good luck and all my best to you.

Sincerley,
SM

Simply De-Lish!

I cant remember where I read about this, but I have been on this kick all summer so far, that might explain my muffin top, but you HAVE TO TRY THIS!
Grill your avacodo halves on the BBQ. Just brush them with olive oil and sprinkle some salt and pepper on them. Grill both sides. Then just eat it out of the shell. ITS AMAZING, You are just gonna die, just DIE! MMMM
Last night I drizzled some citrus soy sauce on them and again I amaze myself!

Awful Library Books

So these 2 librarians down in the mid-west usa, decided that they have had enough with out of date and old rediculous "Awful Library Books". So they started this blog called "Awful Library Books". The real point of the blog was to create awarness for other librarians that librarys really need to be kept up to date, otherwise these old awful books are really just doing a diservice to the public. Besides awareness, this site has become a real hit for everyone, as I heard thier interview with Jian Ghomeshi, you seriously gotta look at these old titles, its too too funny...
AWFUL LIBRARY BOOKS HERE

i dig music

Cool new summer tunes from Kid Koala's The Slew you should download:

Its All Over
You Turn Me Cold

7 +1 days

8 days till Shambhlala. Got your costumes figured out yet?
www.americanapparel.net

Green Lawns

With the looming dry weather and low river levels, undoubtly Fernie is going to see some water restrictions. For the last month as I have been walking my dog around "Little Italy" here in downtown Fernie, I cant help but chuckle and roll my eyes at the older generations from mine that are so obsessed with having a perfect lawn. Im sure those generations sneer and chuckle at my people for our habits and obessions. But this perfect lawn thing is so fucking rediculous. Its something that they grew up with that was a measure of a persons worth in society, and having that perfect lawn indicated to the rest of the town how well-to-do and perfect that household seemed. Well, that idea and symbolic gesture somehow was thrown out the window with generation x and y and z. In fact, our generations adore and revere weeds, natural settings and organic gardens. What will the future hold when, no offence, this older population dies off? What will lawns become?
I know mine is only green if it rains and only cut to apease my landlord (and I dont weed wack, cuz I like weeds growing up the walls).
Everynight I look around and see all these spinklers running, litres and litres of water spilling over sidewalks and running down the street as the lawn is saturated.
Good job! Good thing your lawn looks so great! Is it worth it???? realllllly?
There is this one neighbour of mine, this old polish guy. Hes such an angry old man that hes face is permanently beet red. Hes always yelling at people and dogs. I have seen him re-paint his garage drive way jet black every summer. The guy is obessesd with perfection and he just looks soo goddamn miserable. I wish I could slap some relaxed sense into him before he has a stroke. His sprinklers are always on, hes always out there rearranging them and perfecting his lawn. Ahh what a waste of time! Beside the lawn is parked a monster motorhome - with a "for sale" sign on it. Is he selling the motorhome that would bring some fun and adventure into his old life just so he can stay home and manage his home's image? How incredibly sad.
The green lawn obession needs to die. Besides the pesticide problems that harm our health and dwindling clean drinking water problem, we need to think long and hard about this dinosaur behaviour. Bring on the weeds, dandelions and brown grass. Fuck it, spend your time living your life.

Ribs.

Did you know at Cincott Market, Thursday is Rib night? The Ribs are GIIINORMOUS and they are $2.75 each. you serisouly only need like 2 they are so big. Its a bonus the kick ass sauce is organic and the meat is chemical/hormone free. Im going back tonight with my bib.